Do you love dragon guides" Are you constantly upset about the lack of availability of in-game extras" Do you sit around and think "this game is great but why is it so fricken hard"" Do you hate a well-developed story line" If this is you all day then you need to check out Kidarian Adventures [Free]. Kidarian Adventures is a zany new platformer by Russian developer Hard Slime. The game features cute graphics, customizable gear, and little cutscenes that try to keep players intrigued. The gameplay is easy going?think Super Phantom Cat, but without the polish. That being said, this game has certainly kept me entertained - mostly by shear amused confusion.

Upon launching the game, players will be greeted by your basic game menu. Anyone who has played a mobile game prior should have no trouble figuring out what to do here. The game currently includes 3 episodes with 10 levels in each. When starting up the first level, players are taken to a cutscene that tries to explain why a (presumably") ten year old child is fighting against dangerous plants and animals. Not activities I'd normally endorse for the regular run of the mill ten year old. Now here's where it gets dicey. DON?T BLINK (this is where I high five myself for seamless integration of a Doctor Who reference). Should you blink, you will wish you could go back in time, because you will have no idea what has just happened. So I actually did go back and watch it again so I could figure out...